Your Life Is Not Sustainable
Summer can often be a time when moods soften and life doesn’t feel as heavy. Vacations get booked, time with friends and family become prioritized, sickness decreases being outdoors more, and we’re generally around more people than other seasons. It makes so much sense! The sun is shining, it’s the perfect time to take that PTO, and things can just feel easier for many people.
Inevitably when the fall hits, I see so many people start to recoil into their shells. The overwhelm and stress of day-to-day life slowly creeps back in, and the things you gravitated towards that brought those feel-good-vibes start to dwindle down. These transition times can throw us off balance because for many, especially those who have families or seasonal jobs - they mark new routines, less time with loved ones, and weather begins to shift. If you live anywhere with dramatic season changes (my upstate New York people know this all too well!!) the decreased days of sunshine begin to take their toll on mental health.
These transitions are a good opportunity to really look and see what is working in your life and what is not. Notice what made you feel so good about summer versus winter.
What were you doing when you were feeling better?
Who did you surround yourself with?
What kind of job were you working or did you have time off?
How much space did you leave for yourself to fill up your own cup?
Were you exploring or did you enjoy more time at home?
These questions are so vital to understanding yourself, your own needs, and even your family needs. When we are not aware of what is working for us, then we are destined to continue the same loop. You are more of an active participant in receiving good things in your life than you might realize. Once you know what makes your mood feel lighter, you can begin to figure out how to incorporate those things into your daily and weekly life on a more sustainable basis, regardless of what season it is.
Often times, people want to do their own healing work and figure out how to be the most emotionally grounded, while also being the most highly productive. It can be difficult to allow grace when transitions in life happen, whether it’s seasonal changes, job changes, a loss, or dealing with the invisible stressors that nobody else can see. The expectation to constantly do things as perfectly as possible is not sustainable 100% of the time. Our environments play a huge role in feeling good, or at least feeling even keeled. The more toxic your work environment and the more toxic your relationships, the less space you have to connect with yourself and your own needs. The toxicity fills any open space. It creates the perfect storm for you to be in a vicious cycle. This is not meant to sound easy to get out of, because often when people realize their lives are not sustainable, it becomes a series of tiny steps to begin to shift course. And anyone reading this who is a perfectionist knows that the tiny steps can be SO hard when you’re looking to dive in for that automatic sweeping change. But, we cannot expect change by doing things the same way, resisting change, and expecting a new result.
My hope when you read this blog, is to really spend time reflecting in the questions above if you relate to these seasonal transitions and feel your life is not sustainable for your mental well being all year around. I know it can be frustrating to manage the sense of urgency to want to change things immediately, but that often sets us up for self induced defeat. Understanding what we need, and the deeper work of believing you are worthy enough to have what you need, is a foundation that needs to be solid and secure in order to build upon. This takes awareness and practice with playing around with what works, and noticing how you feel during and afterwards. Just like our bad moods can have a domino effect and spell into our days, our intentionality and good vibes also have the same domino effect.
With love and lots of enduring patience,
Amber
